All the Horrible Girliness

My life is not full of gloom, aches, pains. I know a chick who has not one positive thing to say, ever. She is not happy unless drama is a-happening. She cannot derive pleasure from peace.

[Injected note: The more I think of this, the more chicks I know like this.]

Drama makes for interesting writing, though, so this will be short.

This morning, I had a really good bagel with cream cheese, with a decaf latte and a few Ranier cherries, for breakfast at my table. The table has a real tablecloth and placemats on it now, and it looks awesome. I haven't had a dining table before and it kind of rules.

I woke up earlier than usual. Outside, the air had a nice chill. At Starbucks, I said good morning to someone who smiled at me.

People who meet me from reading my writing don't like me so much. I have an unattractive smile, but I can't help it most of the time. I laugh like crazy. I do this Mel Brooks humor thing where I just rapid-fire jokes out, hoping something will hit, make you laugh.

Last night, we went to our first childbirth prep class. It was rad. Our teacher is hilarious. We've been lucky enough to have funny teachers for most of these things couples have to do - like the marriage prep Catholic class; that was fucking funny, too. So, anyhow, we sat in the back last night like the class clowns and cackled at everything, made fun of everyone under our breath, especially Mister Know-It-All who insisted that a woman's strong urge to push during Transition could be abated if she just told her body to relax.

Thousands of years of birthing and this guy thinks women will just slap their foreheads, widen their eyes, cry out, "Holy shit, you're right! What the hell are we doing practicing all this breathing?"

I'm no good at writing funny. That's much harder than being funny, or writing drama. So I'll quit now.

Everyone, you have a great day. I'm planning on it.

posted by Samus @ 9:09 AM