Monday, March 08, 2010

I am writing this from an iPhone at 12:01 AM. I am grateful for the autocorrect.

I get to this place, seems like every year at this time, when the anxiety can't be quelled with fantasy any longer and I am compelled to blog in the dark to soothe myself into sleep. Usually I tell myself stories so I won't think while I fall asleep but now, I am annoyed with all of my stories. It's a low place. Perhaps it's best to admit it's a low place instead of covering it up. Telling myself lies.

The Bug. My life, will it always be this stressful? Filled with worry for him? For myself? When I first had him I was surprised by how much patience I had. Now, I'm surprised by my lack of it. I have had to apologize so much lately. And he forgives me.