At 2:30 pm, The Bug fists his eyes and yawns and fusses so I know he's tired. Good Mom takes him upstairs, using her Speaking Clock (Suppernanny) to let him know what's coming: milk, a song, then a naptime full of dreams about bunnies and flowers which will take two hours and from which he will wake refreshed and pleasant. Good Mom does the nursing and the song, then The Bug, still behaving like a tired, grumpy old man, starts to thrash. Then, Bad Mom comes in.
Bad Mom puts him down in his bed, again letting him know that it's time for his nap: bunnies, flowers, etc. incoming. The Bug, seeing the bed coming, climbs up Bad Mom's chest to get away, but is thwarted. After depositing The Bug in bed, Bad Mom wishes him a good nap, then leaves the room.
Then, The Bug screams.
He barely had the energy to bring his bottle to his lips fifteen minutes ago, but now he's bellowing like someone is beating him. Bad Mom does a chore, determined to let him suffer it out; he's in a bad habit, this isn't right.
At 3:10 pm, Good Mom takes over. She picks up The Bug, rocks and soothes him, sings three songs, nurses again, then gently lays his sleeping body in bed.
What we're teaching him, I don't know. I have no fucking clue of what I'm doing, except that it's wrong.
posted by Samus @ 3:34 PM
2 Comments:
And somewhere in a parallel universe these two mothers form a third mom: Good enough mom.
Mothering sounds hard. Good, but hard. I feel totally unqualified by the demands of Figaro the cat to understand what you're going through. Yet I am pretty sure that preparing your son for a reality that includes duality is actually a service.
J
Nice post thanks for sharing.
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